Memories of Yoni

1. What happens when the light goes out?
   We stand alone and cry
   And wail, and sob, and pray, and try
   To turn the lights back on
   Till someone comes to hold our hand
   And though dark, still it is
   Comforted are we by this
   But still
   The light has not gone on again
   Nor ever will

When writing about Yoni its difficult to know where to begin, to write about a person who has achieved so much in such a short time Yoni, a friend to so many a person who was so willing to help out to help others enjoy life. His outgoing personability and great smile made everyone who met him feel immediately at ease, memories come to mind of a shabbaton in Israel last year organised for all English students in Israel for a year. Many different types of peopled attended some religious, some not at all. After supper on Friday night all of the BA students sat down to sing some shabbat songs, the other group of students who were not so religious were sitting by themselves it was Yoni who went to them and invited them to join us. One could go on and on writing about Yoni our beloved friend, he will be in our heart for ever and ever.

1. Yoni Jesner was an amazing person. I have memories of this friendly Scot on all Matza Tiyuls over the past years. A few years later I ended up working in his hometown Glasgow alongside him and then when he went to Israel, continued to format his work into the Assemblies that all who go to Hutch Primary will know well. Often having to contact him since I was not in tune with his wacky ideas and interpretation of the different themes and especially the games he invented.
    
   This summer I was lucky enough to have taken machane with him; he was definitely the life and sole of machane, helping out wherever possible. From putting up tents to entertaining kids with his tae-kwan-do or t-shirt making. He defiantly made an impression on all the chanichim he took at machane and defiantly was a source of amusement lightening everybody’s morning up with his breakfast show.

1. It has been a difficult few days for all of us trying to get our heads around what has happened. Not knowing how we are supposed to feel and how we are supposed to act. We have so often heard about terror attacks in Israel and every time it has affected us. But this time it is so different. For me personally, this is the first time that I have known anyone to have been directly involved. And on this first time I have lost someone who was such a significant and important person in my life.
    
   When I heard about the attack I immediately thought of my sister Rachel who lives in Tel Aviv. I finally got through to her and was so happy to hear her voice. An hour later I had to call her back to tell her that Yoni Jesner and Gideon Black had been injured and that Yoni was in a critical condition. Being surrounded by my group gave me much needed support. They were all so kind and we all said tehilim (psalms) at the Kotel (Western Wall) for Yoni. There were rumours flying around and I was confused and still in a state of disbelief.
    
   I decided to spend Chag (the festival) at Rachel’s in Tel Aviv. There was nowhere else I would have been comfortable at this time and I think it was important that we were together. I arrived in Tel Aviv, and together with Rachel, I went directly to Ichilov hospital where almost all of Yoni’s immediate family were already gathered. Also at the hospital were many family friends and yeshiva friends, many were saying tehillim. There were few words but the silence was understood.
    
   There were several hundreds at the funeral many of whom I knew. Family and friends, Bogrim who have made aliya, past shlichim, ex-glaswegians, Rabbanim and many yeshiva boys. Ari gave an emotional eulogy which brought a tear to my eye. I could feel the camera of the press on me, almost intruding on my thoughts of Yoni. Yoni has been buried in the cemetery at the entrance to Jerusalem, a place I am sure you have all passed. I know that everytime I make that journey into Jerusalem I will be upset. I will think of Yoni and all that he accomplished in his short life. All that he gave to all of us. All that we learnt from him. His ability to make us all laugh whilst ensuring that we accomplished the given task. I will miss him.
    
   Chag with Rachel in Tel Aviv was a quiet time with lots of opportunities for Rachel and I to simply talk, try to talk and share our emotions. I had not realised until then how beneficial communication can be and the importance of family. Having spent two very emotional days with my mobile attached to my ear it was relief to turn it off and have some time to myself. I of course attached the mobile right back on my ear the second Shabbat was over!
    
   This morning I came back to meet my group in Jerusalem. I have just started trying to get back into ordinary life. Not an easy task. Everyone around me is constantly asking me how I am, for which I am grateful. Every person who has ever heard of the Jesner family is with all of those who will miss him.
    
   I went with Rachel to visit the family today. Rachel saw her friends Heidi, Gabi and Jared. But where was my friend? Different members of the family were reacting and coping in different ways but the bond between them all was unmissable. After I left I realised that not only had I given the Jesners something by visiting but they had given me something too. They filled me with a renewed sense of strength.
    
   It is impossible for me to get out on the email all my feelings but I really wanted to write to you and let you know a little about Yoni’s funeral and the way his family and friends are copying with this death here in Israel. I want to encourage us all to pick up the phone to call our friends when we need to talk and to write an email when there is something to say. May we never forget how precious our lives are and may Yoni’s memory stay with us and give us strength and inspiration forever.

1. Bnei Akiva has this incredible knack of bringing people together. I was Rosh (head) at Aleph Chalutzi Machane (camp) this summer, when I met Yoni. Although one of the many madrichim at the camp, it was clear from very early on that Yoni would be a central part of our tsevet (team).
    
   The relationship you build with your tsevet is unique. It’s three weeks of 24-7. You see them when they’re up and when they’re down. You see them at their best and at their worst. You see how they cope with problems. You get a real insight into what that person stands for, who they really are.
    
   In the three weeks that we shared at camp this summer, I truly believe that we had the privilege to see the real Yoni.
    
   Yoni was always proud to be a BA-nik (member of Bnei Akiva). We are used to proclaiming our ideology at Bnei Akiva – Am Yisrael, B’Eretz Yisrael, Al Pi Torat Yisrael (the people of Israel, in the land of Israel, living by the Torah of Israel) – but few really live out these dreams. Yoni did. He loved Israel, Torah and his people. As one of the more senior madrichim on the tsevet, he was a shining example to the younger ones of what it means to be a Banik, and most of all, what it means to be a mensch (a good and decent person).
    
   From day one of camp, Yoni was absolutely brilliant. He showed off his talents and stamina throughout the day. He was a madrich as much at home with the serious as he was with the plain ridiculous.
    
   Whatever was going on at machane, Yoni was somehow involved. He would inject his own individual talents into whatever programme he was running, always sprinkling a bit of Yoni into everything. Yoni won respect from the kids very quickly. Whenever he had something to say, they would listen. His groups were always popular – full of fun and inspiration. Whether dressed as a fluffy animal or sitting down discussing the problems that Israel faces today, Yoni was there and was appreciated.
    
   Yoni was famed at machane for the morning “radio show” that he co-presented during breakfast. In the show, Yoni incredibly managed to educate the kids about contemporary Jewish issues, through the show’s mix of music, jokes and wacky interviews. It was his unique ability to channel education through such media of entertainment that made him so brilliant.
    
   Yoni always wanted things to be perfect and whenever he thought that things could be done better, he was not too shy to say so. Whenever there was a complaint, he always had a recommendation or solution to offer – the sign of a gifted leader.
    
   Yoni’s total commitment to Judaism set a wonderful example to the kids and tsevet alike. Whether during shul (synagogue), mealtimes or the rest of the day, Yoni led the way with his dynamic blend of knowledge and fun. Whenever a spare moment in the evenings, Yoni would fight off the tiredness and find strength to open up a sefer (book) and study some Torah.
    
   It was a true privilege to have worked with Yoni over the summer. It is a blessing to have known Yoni and to have been touched by him. The 124 young people that made up Aleph Chalutzi camp 2002 will always cherish the memories they have of Yoni – our colleague, our friend and our inspiration.
    
   Our prayers are with Yoni’s family and friends at this most difficult time.

1. Dear Hashem
    
   Please look after my dear friend Yoni who you have chosen to come and be with you in heaven. He’ll probably have loads of questions to ask you since he devoted his life to learning more about you and studying your books, you were his favourite author. Be patient with him and challenge him, it won’t take long for you to see how clever he is. Give him your time and he will be a good friend to you just like he has been to me. If you ever have a problem you can most definitely turn to him and he can always be relied on to give good advice. If you ever need a shoulder to cry on turn to Yoni as he is one of the kindest, most caring people I have ever met. Tell him how much I love him and make sure he looks down on me once in a while; I will make him proud.
    
   All my love
   Judith

1. Jeremy, former Glasgow Maccabi youth worker, says he remembers when the youth forum organised the strawberry fields night club evening. Yoni was buying drinks for under ages in the club and he got caught buying the drinks and was thrown out the night club! He actually insisted that no one would leave the club with him. He went on his own, quite happy to leave.
    
   Jeremy would like to send a message that he is thinking of everyone in Glasgow in our time of mourning and hopes we can all pull through together as a community.

1. Dear Yoni
    
   You are in our hearts
   Your are in our souls
   Leaving us in this way
   You left many holes
    
   To say we are sorry
   To say we are sad
   Is not enough for a
   Tragedy so bad
    
   We wish you could still
   Be here with us
   If only that suicide bomber
   Had not got on the bus
    
   We prayed for your life
   Many came for you
   To say we, wish you better
   To say we’re missing you
    
   We wish you were here
   But sadly you can’t be
   We want to hold you in our arms
   Especially me
    
   We just want to say
   What a great friend you were to us
   Oh how much we wish
   That suicide bomber didn’t get on the bus